Saturday, March 20, 2010

When TV Comes To Life

Reno 911! came to life yesterday at work. I could not believe how accurate it was! For those of you who aren't familiar with the character T.T., she is this out-of-control local that rarely has a bra on let alone a shirt on. She screams and yells and most of the time, you don't know what she is saying due to her buck teeth. She's either drunk or high and always flailing.

The only visual I could find was this quick clip in a video at :36 seconds in.

I had the joy of witnessing what is no doubt T.T.'s inspiration. Meet this beauty:

Not to worry! She isn't dead, she's only faking it.

How did this begin you ask? Fortunately I was there to witness the entire thing. There is a man that comes in to clean the establishment. On this particular day, he chose to bring his wife for some help. Owner was not around but it seemed harmless enough.

Then she turned on the radio. Blasted it so the walls were shaking. Then she started fighting with her husband about Pinesol, taking his job from him, and other things I could not understand. Owner shows up and is not thrilled. There was some yelling, not sure what was said. But I understood owners words "Get her out of here."

Then I hear her scream and there is a slapping noise, I look down and my little owner boss is dragging this lady out of the establishment. The physics of it alone were mind boggling! After that, she just laid there. At first I thought she was unconscious, but saw her crack a little smile so knew she was faking. (I am also witnessing this from three stories above.)

Cops took 29 minutes to show up. Not good form Cleveland's Finest! While we waited, Husband is begging Owner not to fire him and explaining that she has four personalities. Apparently one of them woke up at that moment because she sat up and started screaming bloody hell. Then, fell right back down in the mud. Husband tried to pick her up, and she went dead weight on him, which made me snort in laughter. In all honesty, the whole situation was sad but let's be honest, I've seen some crazy shit in my working day but this was a chart topper. I knew I wasn't in harms way so I just went with it.

So for the next 29 minutes, she would occasionally shout things, clap her hands while yelling a bunch of things like "Ima hit you like a man" and others that were indistinguishable. She was finally taken away in the back of the car. But first, she tried to drop and roll (in cuffs), which was not a good idea because she ripped her shirt. Oops.

Poor owner got a black eye and I hear she spent a couple hours in a cell. Husband was back the next day so I guess it all got worked out. But wow! What an interesting day!

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